Extinguished

I lost my spark that lived within your songs
the ones you sang to me and those silent
syllables prouncing the right and wrong
dismissed by years of non verbal violence
The poetic lantern to guide me home
extinguished itself the moment you left
You returned for a night to scold and scorn
the pent up anger and sadness I kept
hidden from myself, the world and from you
Convincing my heart it would somehow work
out if you could see from a different view,
Praying you would decide never to hurt
me, you would love me and want me to stay
here without the one that pulled you away

Six

You spoke with your cries
at first
looking down at your hands
shortly after discovering you had them
proclaiming a milestone
But it was your eyes
those deep, searching
blue-grey libraries of wonder
penetrating every unkown around you
like a soldier through the last gate to victory
Your mind sang and celebrated
as you learned life
determined to make each thought
a verbal memory
off all that you saw
And now...
you speak with your sighs
silent and sad
Missing something you never had
Wondering why your words
ever began at all

Karma

You son of a bitch
taking him away
to the lies and deception
you introduced that day!
Why can't you just be a real friend
and keep the lone wolf cravings at bay?
I hope fate cashes in
when true love finally looks your way
and you lose someone to drugs
like I just did today

You son of a bitch
promising not to leave me --
then sneaking away again
pretending not to decieve me
Insulting me to the core
not bothering to retrieve me
by asking total forgiveness
for the lies you told to mislead me
and now I have nothing
but six broken hearts that are bleeding

Splinters

Don't say I love you
as you're walking out the door
Those words mean nothing to me
I don't believe you anymore
You whispered them into my ear
when we were fucking on the floor
So don't say I love you
as you're walking out the door

Don't say I miss you
five years or days from now
You'll break my heart into pieces
that should be your vow
Not promises that fade
"I'm ready to move forward now..."
Don't say I miss you
five years or days from now

Don't say I'm sorry
for all the pain you caused
The selfish beast you claim to have tamed
has drawn its bloody claws
And all that's left is shreds of me
splintering in the pause
Don't say I'm sorry
for all the pain you caused

Don't say anything
you're good at doing this
Don't say goodbye
or leave me with a kiss

I always stood by your side
through all of the fucking bullshit
Just walk out of the door
and forget all of it

Breathe

Without your smoke and mirrors
you would be lost
but it's a dangerous addiction
look how much it cost
Not just in bank fees
and all-consuming shame
but in ruining your self worth
tarnishing your name
All that you worked for
(or supposedly -- who really knows)
is gone the very second
you breathe through your nose

Insult

You don't work
Therefore the money isn't yours
I don't think you could have insulted me more!
Add up every last thing
I've bought since we met
Sell each one at full price
or one hundred dollars more
and I swear to you -- I bet
you could never afford
to pay what I'm worth
or hire me --that's for sure
Priceless is my paycheck
for all of my hard work
My ego has been hurt
self dignity on the floor
Sometimes your mean spirit
is too much for me to endure
You don't work
Therefore the money isn't yours...

Pink

My heart can't find the words to express
my overwhelming joy and happiness
I keep waiting for the perfect inspiration to write
but it came to me while looking into your eyes tonight
Though you deserve something more profound and deep
these words are only yours to hear and keep:
I know we will hit the crossroads someday
where you take what you've learned and go away
But in the quiet of this moment I whisper with a kiss
My world is complete now that you exist

*Dedicated to my daughter