Comfort

Not very often
but once in awhile
I wonder what they would think
if they knew
And then I'm with you
I can say anything
I can be myself
We laugh and live --
We really live
So I think, who cares?
We are sharing the love
that others only dream about
We are daring to know
while others still exist in doubt
And that feeling
that chrysalis of comfort
has changed me forever
And you are someone
I can't live without

Catching Myself

Please turn your shirt around
the tag goes in the back
How old are you again?
Do I have to repeat that?
Why am I fighting
to keep you focused and calm --
You make me feel
like I've done it all wrong
And just when I hear
the futile edge to my tone
I forget to remember to forget
that I'm facing all of this alone

Unanimous

Maybe the something more
is a hope I've created in my mind
our solid love from the past
no longer exists in our time
And the warmth of cradling life
within my trusting womb
has faded into cliched phrases:
I'll see you soon
I want to feel secure in your arms
just like I did many times before
I miss knowing you miss me
embracing when you walk through the door
Today I am worn with confusion
we will never get back to us
Emotions tire you, anger you
you turn away again
and the vote against me is unanimous

Things I Will See Soon

A break in the clouds
of this overcast day
My little boys' smiles
as they run and play
Tiny hummingbirds fluttering
around their new feed
My garden of flowers
with one stubborn weed
This church with its people
lifting their sweet voices
A buffet with four children
too many choices
White dishes sparkling
because they are clean
Four baskets of laundry
I'm dreading to meet
A warm, simmering pot
full of potatoes and stew
Twenty four baked cookies
eaten down to just a few
A busy weekly planner
filling up with more commitments
School night bedtime curfews
met with too much resistance
A thousand lego blocks
scattered around the floor
Second place racing ribbons
proudly framing the door
Shoes and clothes laid out
next to backpacks and folders
Hugs that linger longer
I realize they are growing older
Conversations about dreams
and wizards fighting dragons
What we would do with a wand
if any of us had one
Young imaginations wander
while reading stories into the night
Kissing soft, breathing lips
as I turn off all the lights
Mother's milk of comfort
despite trying to wean
Gives peace and tranquility
to this otherwise lonely scene
A quiet, dark house
with emotions worn and fraying
Little dreamers drifting off
While I kneel down praying
But the one thing I need most
from every point of view
Is the one thing I won't see soon --
you

Thoughts of You

The softness of your hand

tenderly wrapped around mine

The warmth of your whisper

just outside of my ear

The taste of your lips

when we first kiss

The heat of your skin

pressed firmly against mine

The sighs we create

when falling deeper into each other

The love we make

over and over

The places we dream

when sleeping side by side...

I miss you.

One Small Bite

One bite for me
tastes bitter sweet
One for you becomes a
foul scented defeat
My tears brimming over
into your winning smile
My guilt underneath
your overwhelming fears
I almost cried again
until you touched my heart
with those eyebrows arched
in excited proclamation
whispering proudly
I tried it!

Girl Talk

You don't understand the madness
or the fear inspiring futlility
Justification is like pornographic religion
a certain impossibility to merge
between the beautiful and forbidden
Lies and sighs make you decide
to hold onto the love you are given
If you could have heard my smile
If you could have seen the awe,
the surprised looks on their faces
They won't admit for awhile --or at all
how I've fallen from their graces
but somehow deeper into their trust tonight
You would know how much I love you
How very much to me --
You are worth this fight