Explanation

I returned too quickly --
before I was healed
and with each passing day
my writing reveals
a futile desire
I need you to feel
Love, you took my inspiration
when you left me

Justification for Pessimistic Poetry

Some optimistic people
find irresistible beauty
in the shade of blood
a deep crimson trail
that slowly trickles down
the trembling finger
quivering so slightly
from the instant pain
it felt when penetrated
by the solid sharp thorn
of the coral spring rose

No matter how incredible the bloom

Autobiography

I was only folding laundry
listening to the sounds
of the singer singing the song
about the girl he can't live without
The sweeter tears fell slowly at first
with every note he sang
until I felt his love for her
then I felt nothing but bitter pain
I want my smile to heal someone
and make him feel alright
Why can't I be the one
someone misses terribly tonight
Please let me linger on someone's mind
until he can't take it anymore
make him long to touch my skin again
and feel like he did before
I want to be respected
for the love I freely give
instead of being rejected
and constantly having to forgive
Is there someone who needs to hear
the soft sound of my voice
To me it should be clear
I am his only choice
He would never walk away
because it would hurt him too
He would easily appreciate
All that we'd been through
Reciprocated love
is what I'm dying to know
But the more I ask for love to stay
the faster it seems to go
What secret beauty
did the girl in his song possess
To make the man desire her
as much as he professed?
I suppose passionate lyrics are written
for gullible people like me
I will never be loved as deeply as that
It's just not my reality
Instead I will continue to write these thoughts
of my silent autobiography

Meditation

My heart is buried in your thoughts today
Though I can't seem to explain it all
I want to help you find your way

Familiar songs cannot make you stay
You don't hear my soft voice call
My heart is buried in your thoughts today

Free your soul, try to escape
The brow of the concrete wall
I want to help you find your way

To find the white behind the grey
Or pray for a new rain to fall
My heart is buried in your thoughts today

Are you lost or quietly hidden away
Curled up tightly in a ball?
I want to help you find your way

Your hopes and dreams are mine today
While you temporarily struggle and crawl
My heart is buried in your thoughts today
I want to help you find your way

Ego

Rough rope tied
around your heart
squeezing words
and thoughts apart
She pulls you in
to satiate
then grabs you
just to castrate
Your dreams until
they are almost dead
and you are shivering
alone in your bed
Restless nights
under stars without fire
with hope feeling gone
and vision uninspired
She brings you down
past where you were
it's only important
when it relates to her
To escape her you need
to come home to the girl
holding love, light
and a string of pearls...

Tender Spot

My stomach turns from a chalk white pill
to kill the dull and aching pain
This tender spot under my skin
is burning like a fiery stain
I need sweet songs to cure my mind
or mention of those images
and moving pictures I've left behind
in vain attempts to love and give
The best of me you asked to hold
but your hands grasp half heartedly
with nonchalance that will unfold
and drop the precious parts of me
My body hurts less than my soul
a growing, infectious damaging pain
This tender wound needs to be healed
with the soothing touch of a warmer rain

Hardening

The softness you once held within your arms,
Has hardened into cold and heavy stone.
No tossing of this weighted pebble knows
The smoothness of our quiet lake --it's gone.