Disconnected

He moves and yet you still will never know
the way my soul will stretch too far to break
into an open grave for as he grows
he's dying to reclaim a past mistake
Come here! Oh, if you could you'd hear his voice
a soft and loving coo from deep within
But realize he'll never have the choice
to stay inside the place where it begins;
The dream of life and love as it should be
encapsulates closed flutters of his lids
The hope for anti-animosity
will shed itself from what his hands can give
He sleeps now, quietly so far to go
And while he waits, you still will never know

The Letter

The letter --
was it a misprint?
Sent via careless forethought?
Scratchy and nervous manuscript
I deserved what I got
Was it some kind of missing apology
that you found but quickly lost?
Did you know it made me cry again?
You didn't stop to subtract the cost?!
Regardless of your reason
It's at the very bottom
of an abandoned, overfilled trashlot

Fragments

Fragments of discussions
linger on my mind
Frustrated awareness
our thoughts are not aligned
Like rushing into a battle
filled with hidden mines
Shrapnel tears right through me
While I bleed double time

Choose

Take her offer
she won't let you refuse
Let her have all of you
she knows how to abuse
The private and public
ways to amuse
Her greedy needs
however --
you choose...

Meditation

Your familiar soul
alive from the stars
Your repertoire of breaths
intertwined within mine
And you meditate so quietly
so close to my heart
An unborn son
a priceless gift
another precious life

*for AJ

Consume

Touch me…caress me…take me
glide your hands across my skin
Curl your fingers around my own
releasing my desires within
Kiss me deeply – consume me with love
like the ocean surrounds the blue
Run your fingers through my silky hair
make me beg for you
Wrap your body tightly around mine
pull me close to your searching lips
Surrender to our synchronized sighs
This is how tonight begins…

Bridge

Silence is
a long and solid 
sturdy bridge
to Anger

Angel's Lovesong

Return the angel’s quiet song
to Heaven now
her voice is strained
and faded from the cold
Miscalculate the tears she hides
while she is falling down
as angel’s wings will finally unfold;
Repeat the sound
as angel’s love is sanctified
despite the fact
her dreams are growing old
Decrease the price
as angel’s love is demoralized
bought for one again,
then quickly sold

Telescope

telescope the night
planets reflect short footsteps
light years in between

Father's Devotion

deep wrinkles reveal
engraved long hours of worries
desperate devotion

Sparrow

sparrow sings softly
lonely beneath winter chills
cradling summer's hope

Serpent

My will allows this sadness to unfold:
uncoiled anger, resentment and deep fears
slide into me and tongue fuck my remorse
inside a darkened room where you're not here
The sex and silence shed from serpent scales
are dead in piles of dust upon the ground
I feel the venom pierce my heart like nails
but never will I utter one more sound
I take the vile creature into my arms
attempt to soothe and drain his greedy needs
but something breaks his false and shady charm
and then he strikes me -- leaving wounds that bleed
For years and years without healing in sight
I slowly die from each strategic bite

Hibernation

Hibernate my passion
quiet determination
Curled into a cocoon
of metaphored frustration
Confusion binds my wings
bruised from conversations
I will not concede
to anymore sensations

Retreat

seagull's lonesome cry
tall silhouette disappears
dusk tipped waves retreat

Florida

My eyes narrow and strain
to carefully focus
on the traces
of where you've been
and the brilliant
late afternoon view
But the footprints confuse me
too many to separate
and all I see
are the future places
I long to be with you

Connected (Sweet and Simple Reflection)

Missed you throughout the night
will long for you during the day
But I feel you deep inside of my soul
in all that I do and say
I love you with all of my heart
Trying to make you see
We may be miles apart
but you are always right here with me
My feelings are deadly fragile
your voice is desperately calling
My heart is controlling the weather
but your love keeps my soul from falling
Simple and sweet reflection:
futility redirected
Innocent heart's confession:
we are still connected
Comforting realization:
we are forever connected

Decree

One quick but delicate pattern
becomes a rhythm of hope
faster than before
softer within my heart
A prayer of wanting more
turns into guilty greed
but a stroke of permanent blush
is something that I need
I feel a sudden rush
my hand protects the womb
holding a firm decree
which I will know too soon
My gratefulness renewed
as I dream, hope, pray and think
will his eyes be blue
or will her smile be pink

Rewrites

So I'm your fool now? Some distrusted liar?
Your words are the anti-punchline to love
that I gave to you in complete desire
in genuine ecstasy --and for what?
So you can move on and rewrite your cause?
Recreate stories to wash your sins pure
Can poetry convey how hard it was
to give you myself based on "I'm not so sure"
or the moments you hurt me (I lost count) --
deserting me, not wanting me around?
My heart loved you most. My hands salted red;
stains from the tears you never felt me cry
when begging -- pleading -- for you to regret
the pain you inflicted from quiet lies
I'll play the bad girl -- the mean, heartless wench
Blooming amid your foul, deceitful stench

Comfortable Denial

Your not so subtle messages
and painful references
so much you now deny
are as comfortable to me as
a heart gasping for breath
crushed by broken ribs...
and two permanently swollen black eyes