to you inside of my drawer
for me to secretly keep
A place to capture
my thoughts and reasons
that cause my heart to weep
I've now disengaged
myself from you
in ways you will never see
You asked me today
is it life or death --
does it really have to be?
If needing you
takes so much of your
precious little time
Then no more will
I ask of you
to share this life of mine
I know that I
can't find the strength
to walk away today
but hope remains
that someday soon
you will beg me to go away
The boys are growing
and they will know
just where you were --
not here
My smiles mask
the difficult task
of swallowing my fears
To get to the end
and look back with regret
on all that we could have been
To know that I lived
half a life without love
and never had a true friend
I tried to explain
in simple words
it has to be different and
you don't believe
that I could find it all
with some other loving man
I can and you will see
A foolish girl
to think that a movie
could touch you deep inside
it revealed the tears
I could not cry --
the hurt I have to hide
You laughed at my wish
to be one of Jane's girls
saying you found it
so very endearing
But you failed to listen
and my desire to be loved
is what you should have been hearing
"Everyone, everything
is second to you"
that's the facade
I couldn't bear
For so many years
I desperately tried
to show you I just wanted you there
Why was it so plain
for the whole world to know
and everyone else to see
Each time that I needed you
and asked you not to go
You chose them over being with me
"I have no choice?"
There is always a choice
it's a right we earned to make
But living the wrong ones
seems to be the path
you are blindly willing to take
Last night you touched my hand
and actually cried yourself,
I could have sworn your words were true
but now I see
short-lived, short loved
is all that I am to you...
So much for my dream
of growing old in someone's arms
So much for your hope of "round two."
Inspired by The movie The Thing About My Folks
No comments:
Post a Comment