Was that really true?
Because I know you will be fine
With your peace, beauty and family
I won't have to waste your time
justifying my love for you
explaining what it means
My God our conversations!
Complete faith in things unseen?
And you don't understand my ability
to love you outside of myself?
I don't understand your constant choice
to shove me on some hidden shelf
along with the memories and dreams
you are too scared to confront
Change is a choice you know
And how can you not choose your son?
Or the woman who gave him life
cradling him in her womb?
Vomiting up hopes and fears
on the cold floor of the bathroom
I used to believe in somehow, someway
before I had to face your silence
Patiently swallowing your pride each day
has turned my resentment to violence
I almost gave in to the distant star
But it only reminded me again
we haven't come very far
After all of this time
We are still where we are
You will feel no epiphany
that I've prayed for each night
I bite my lip, close up my heart
and turn off the light
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